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Erotisphere Blogosphere

This is where blog happens.
by AnDroid

Publishes every
Thursday afternoon
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NoPo Anticon: The Aftermath

Pantsless in Portland
Written by Surly Santa   
Thursday, 10 December 2009 16:20

I awoke on a stranger's floor, fully clothed in my red Santa suit and heavy black boots. Next to me my hat, wig, and beard were scrunched up beside an overturned glass pipe. I picked up the pipe and jabbed my finger into the bowl, feeling nothing inside but ash. Then, grabbing a  coffee cup from the cluttered coffee table, I stumbled past the fat guy sleeping on the couch and went into the kitchen. Shoving stacks of dirty dishes aside, I filled the cup with water from the faucet and took a swig, grimacing from the taste of plastic and rust.


Doug Stanhope: Our Drunken Antihero

Pantsless in Portland
Written by AnDroid   
Thursday, 03 December 2009 16:20

Comedian Doug Stanhope came out with his new album, From Across the Street, just in time for one of my least favorite holidays this year, and it's a cheerfully dark, fucking depraved masterpiece of comedy. It's “not for everyone,” as he frequently reminds you, which falls right in line with the brooding, drug-addled Portland spirit. He's got a bit of a cult following here. He's what you might call a Portland sweetheart - meaning when he's in town he likes to put cigarettes out on our bare inner thigh and ram his spit-lubed finger up our ass, just how we like it.


Happy Thanksgiving!

Pantsless in Portland
Written by AnDroid   
Thursday, 26 November 2009 16:20
If you're lonely enough to be reading this blog on Thanksgiving, BarFly has put together a list of bars that are open today, which includes a few of my favorite strip clubs: DV8, Hawthorne Strip, and, of course, Mary's Club!

Guest Bloggers
Written by Sketchy Justin   
Thursday, 19 November 2009 16:20

The NORML Cannabis Café opened at 4:20pm for reasons that should be obvious to anyone who has ever known anyone who has ever smoked marijuana, ever. Portland Police stopped by and checked the place out. Finding no legitimate reason to arrest anyone, they left and gave the party their blessing.


Casey's is Still Open

Pantsless in Portland
Written by AnDroid   
Thursday, 12 November 2009 16:20

I hadn't left the house in over a week when I met a couple friends at a poetry slam at Backspace last Sunday evening. The slam was alright. The girl who ended up winning was pretty talented, and she turned out to be only 18, which was impressive. When the thing was over I still felt rambunctious. The friends I'd met hopped on a bus to go home, and I stood on the street corner wondering what to do. I saw that there were lights on up the street at Casey's, so I decided to check it out.


Halloween and NaNoWriMo

Pantsless in Portland
Written by AnDroid   
Thursday, 05 November 2009 16:20

I went out to get beer last night and realized our house is the only one on the block with Halloween decorations still up. The skeleton on our door is getting real spider webs on it, the jack-o-lanterns are starting to sag, and the striped stockings on the mannequin legs sticking out from under our house are getting soggy and mud-stained. Yesterday was actually the first time I'd stepped outside since Halloween. I've been locked in the house, banging away at my computer. For the first time I'm seriously participating in National Novel Writing Month (NaNoWriMo).



Pantsless in Portland
Written by AnDroid   
Thursday, 29 October 2009 16:49

“Drink the sickness away,” my mom used to say. I pondered this as I inhaled the steam from my hot toddy, my breath ragged, my throat sore, my nose completely stuffed up. Laurel was sipping a dirty martini and telling me about her crazy dating life. She was dressed up nice and showing a considerable amount of cleavage. We were pre-loading for the final screening of HUMP!, the amateur porn festival showing a Cinema 21.


Puppetry of the Penis

Pantsless in Portland
Written by AnDroid   
Thursday, 22 October 2009 16:20

I love older women, particularly cougars, and this week I got to observe them in one of their natural habitats. On Sunday, Kimbot and I attended the Puppetry of the Penis show at the Aladdin Theater, along with the biggest horde of MILFs and rabid cougars I've ever seen. Hussied-up middle-aged women packed the seats of the venue en masse, forming a mob of push-up-bra-cleavage, big hair, and meaty calves, and all to see two young men play with their average-sized penises. I was reminded of the final scene from Full Monty, and it got me thinking: Could Portland support a full-time male strip club for women?


KMFDM: A Haiku

Pantsless in Portland
Written by AnDroid   
Thursday, 15 October 2009 16:20

is the greatest band ever.
Suck it, other bands.



Pantsless in Portland
Written by AnDroid   
Thursday, 08 October 2009 16:20

I'm moody by nature. It's in my bipolar genes. Sometimes I get an itch, a crazy itch inside my brain, and I have this insuppressible urge to find trouble. In the summer of 2006, I was sitting alone at the rail at a strip club called the Acropolis, and I actually found Trouble. She lived up to her name.

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